Thursday, 11 May 2017

Antisocial

"You must say,"
They tell you
As they welcome you in
"You must say if it's too much"
And you nod
And you grin
But when you finally find
That you can handle no more, 
When your body is screaming,
Limbs leaden and sore,
And you try your goodbyes
Before you fall to the floor 
Then there's always ten reasons
Or more to delay you
There are photos to take
Or leftovers to fetch you
So you nod 
And you smile 
like an ungrateful wretch
Because all you would like
Is some peace and your bed
But you're in someone's house
Being 'human' instead
Even though noise and light
Is attacking your head
And your heart it keeps racing,
Your limbs feels like lead,
So you wait patiently
And you try to join in
As they search for a camera
And you nod 
And you grin
But the batteries are dead
And the irony's not lost
So you wait even longer
No matter the cost
Because you ate all their food
And you managed some wine
You don't want to be rude
So pretend that you're fine
And the camera is back 
But the batteries won't work
And there's flapping and fuss
So you nod 
And you smirk
And suggest that perhaps
As we all have smartphones
Could they not just use that
So that you can get home  
And you nod 
And you smile 
For these people you love
You try to ignore 
all the noise and hubbub
Then as soon as it's done
There's leftovers to get
There are goodbyes to say
So you can't leave just yet
So you wait on the sofa
And try not to mind
That you feel like a truck
Has hit you from behind
And then finally
Once you are able to rise,
Despite the pain in your back
And the ache in your thighs,
You make for the door
And are helped outside
By some wonderful people,
So thoughtful and kind,
But they stop for a chat
And you don't have the heart 
To tell them you're struggling
And cut them off short
Or explain you can't stand
That your legs feel like sponge
And you really can't handle
Being upright this long -
You're way past your limit
But you nod 
And you breathe,
Slowly sink to the concrete
Where you wait patiently
For the talking to cease 
And you silently pray 
For some kind of release,
Someone to take you away,
For the heavens to part
And a giant hand to come,
Pluck you from pergatory
And spirit you home
But the hand doesn't come
So you nod 
And you smile
Prepare to get comfy
On the concrete a while
And then just when you think
You're ok on the floor 
The conversation ends
And you must stand up once more
With you knees a-creaking
And your spine fit to snap
You somehow get back 
to the car and collapse

And when you are finally 
Home in your bed
Surrounded by silence
And darkness instead
You grimace through the pain
And you ask yourself why,
Why your life is so hard,
And you cry, 
and you cry,
And you cry until there 
are no tears left to cry
Because all that you wanted
Was to see those you love
Not be left in such pain
That you feel you might die,
So you ask yourself even though
You know there's no 'why'
And you cry, 
and you cry, 
and you cry..........


© Charlotte Green
11th May 2017



1 comment:

  1. This is brilliant, I have read it out loud a couple of times and the rhythm and the way the words change pace is so good when heard out loud. It should be performed somewhere, at a spoken word night or on youtube. The subject matter is unfortunately very familiar, but you put it across in such an entertaining way.

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